Picture this. It was a Saturday morning. I was wearing the heavy overcoat of my hangover acquired from the cheap wine of a friday night. As I tentatively made a healing cup of char I saw something scuttle across my kitchen floor. Screaming, I threw myself onto the kitchen counter in the manner of some 1940s chick flick.
Egor the mouse was loose in the house.
He found refuge in the metal underbelly of the fridge. I lay in wait for nearly twenty minutes taunting him with my weapon of choice, a strip of highly polished bamboo flooring. When Egor tired of my pathetic torture he made his escape scurrying to the nearest cupboard.
Needless to say, I was now very cross. As I flung open the kitchen cupboard doors to illustrate my anger I spied the many many 'presents' Egor had left me. It was obvious that our prisoner had been escaping the theatre room every night after we had retired to bed.
So I stealthily opened each door locating the little bugger in the last cupboard. However, there is a reason why mice don't rule the world, they simply don't understand the principles of camoflage and staying hidden. He was crouched between the plates and the wall with his bum and tail fully visible practically chuckling to himself with his fantastic hiding place.
I looked at my bamboo plank and re-assessed. This wouldn't cut it. Obviously I needed a grabbing device. I quietly searched around the kitchen for such an implement when my eyes came across the barbeque tongs!
Perfect.
I crept up to the quivering mouse clad with pink rubber gloves (myself, not the mouse obviously) and with tongs held aloft. There I waited for my moment.
That's when Dave came home. Quickly I thrust the tongs at him, jumped around the living room waving pink rubber hands and bamboo around. Dave grabbed the mouse who was shrieking (the mouse and not Davo) and I held the door open for him as he marched outside and launced the mouse over the fence!
See, I caught him all by myself! Aren't I the bravest thing on the planet?
10 comments:
finally a post!
I've missed you.
You are very brave indeed. That monkey's trajectory looks poor though.
I reckon he landed on the grass.
AND
What kind of person has a theatre room!!!
You bloody noveau riche princess!!!!
Re-enactment was performed by Jake who is staying at our house.
He's four.
I've missed you too. Fancy a beer in 26 days?
Loving the re - enactment in piccies there Nat! Glad the mouse is gone, so lovely of Davo to fling him over the fence!!!
hehe,
Moo, Our other house guest Jake (the four year old) has been obsessively playing "Chuck the monkey with the tongs" all afternoon!
Ali, Morning love, howyis?
Yup, I'm there Natterjack! Can't wait!
That monkey has been sighted at numerous desks in my office!!!!
Brrrrrrrrrrrrrr!
Good to have you back blogging Nat, I miss reading you.
xx
Thanks for a really entertaining post - very funny indeed and great pics to boot!
hello, i'm good thanks, u?? on nites. one to go yippeeeeee. your house looks fab, had a birthday last week, 31 can u believe it. that means i'm nearly 40, gosh wheer does the time go....
me thinks that jake is the bravest 4 year old scottish kid in australia!!!! dont be gone too long honey, am missing you!!! say hello and much hugs to jim and kirsty and rho and rob!!!
Spunky, Will email re: beers in Londres. Can't wait!
Reidski, Ta. Inspiration strikes maybe once a year..
Ali, Happy birthday love. 31 is the new 21. Enjoy yourself.
Shazza, I won't be gone for long, will be back here before I even know it. Ta for coming over on Sat, was a good night. Can't wait to see KP frocked up.
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