(myself and Dave's mates race horse "Champy")Yesterday it was the Melbourne Cup. 'The race that stops a nation'.
I forgot to watch it. I was too busy hoovering!
Horse racing is a big thing over here. I've only ever been to the races in Australia. Never in Blighty. Oh well, I guess the weather is a big part of that reason. There is no flipping way I would stand in the driving rain acquiring frost-bitten toes watching some pony trot around a muddy field. But if you mention a day of sunshine, beer and winning big bucks then I'm in!
The first horse I bet on I won. I chose him not because of it's immaculate breeding or shiny coat but because it was called Chaka Khan. Thinking of Chaka always takes me back to the night Ali, Nicky, Nat and I saw Chaka in Ibiza. She was fabulous and was singing her little heart out on stage wearing one of those all in one lacy body stockings! Tres eighties! Such good memories. Anyway I won eight bucks betting on chaka and there began my 'Natalie Code of Winning'
Rules:
- Always scan the names of the horses and if one jumps out immediately then pick it.
- If no names jump out then go to the mounting paddock and look at the jockeys and their legs. My theory is the jockey with the shortest legs will always do best as they have less distance from hip to knee to bob up and down meaning their rythm will be quicker thus spurring the horse on faster!
- If legs and names don't cut it then always fall back on the jockey wearing the gaudiest colours. It'll blind and distract the naturally fashion concious horses into keeping a distance between them and the gaudy (none of us like to stand next to someone wearing fluorescent pink and green do we?)
Anyway I applied the rules to the Melbourne Cup and I came up with 'Makybe Diva'. I liked the name and was determined to bet on it. Until I found out that he had won the past two years. Thats not fair so I withdrew my support from the diva.
Big mistake, huge!
The diva won for the third year running making history and wheelbarrows full of money. Always, always go for your first instinct!
Every workplace has a sweepstake and the papers print out a double page poster to enable workplaces to sit around for half an hour to watch the race, critique the fashions (truck loads of feathers this year. Would have liked to have seen all the ladies five hours later when they were rolling drunk and inadvertantly tickling passers-by with their hiccupping feathers!) and gorge themselves silly on chocolate cake. The public are trying to force the government to proclaim Melbourne Cup day as another bank holiday so people don't have to go into work! Genius.
For our sweepstake I picked eyepopper out of the bag. He lost! My winning streak is probably over.
3 comments:
Last horse race i went to we bet on a horse called Morph. Well we had to didn't we?!
He so nearly won! The adrenaline rush was great, i yelled my head off. Apparently there's a bet you can win if your horse is placed in the first 3. I didn't do that one unfortunately.
If you come back here in the summer we shall go to Newmarket Nights.
This basically means you drink and watch the horses in the afternoon and drink and listen to a tribute band or a Z-list popstar at a concert in the evening. After that if you are not too drunk to stand you all pile on down to De Niro's nightclub to boogy till you do drop.
Tis much fun, especially if it's a hot summer evening.
the best reason to pick a horse! and wot a fab night out that was ;o) x
have never done the horse racing thing apart from on the telly on grand national day. have been to a few race nights tho, alledgedly you bet on pre recorded races on the big screen, i have never done the betting thing. always be either of two things 1. too busy getting drinks at the bar, 2. too drunk already!!!!! the last one i went to i spent the evening showing off my tattoos to everyone, its just a pity it was mikeys football teams parents!! guess who is the most talked about parent?????
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