Mama, look away now....
Ladies and gentlemen, may I present you with Peggy:
Isn't he pretty?
This is what the missus looks like...
I named her Peggy after my Grandmother. Peg died about seven years ago and I really felt that I needed my Granny back!
Anyway after an afternoon of waffling on to Peg about what I had been up to in my recent life (and poking her web with a stick) she disappeared on me.
...I didn't take it badly. Obviously Peg needed to do other important stuff and maybe she didn't appreciate me poking around her web and baby spiders with my big stick.
It happens.
After a couple of days of rushing outside to see if Peg had come home and being disappointed about the lack of mama Spider activity in the web in the shed, I came to realise that even Winifred Margarets need their time away from the family.
So that is where Vera came in.
Cue Mike (the dust and fag and coffee machine that is reparing the ceiling) with his ultra sonic powered magic dusting machine.
I arrived home one afternnoon, literally to see a massive spider shaking in its eight very furry boots!
Vera! I cried. How lovely to see you. Peggy is just outside. She won't come in (how true to life are these spiders???)
(Vera is my Nana!)
This is what Vera will grow to in a couple of months.
...Don't worry, her bark is much worse than her bite!
Vera taught me how to microwave scrambled eggs in the microwave (no kitchen due to no ceiling!) and kept me company throughout the building fiasco. Am quite surprised that she didn't get her casio keyboard out to start singing 'songs of our war time' at me!
On another note, it's time for song of the week.....
The Grates 19-20-20
18 comments:
Yuk! I had to kill a spider last night, bastard things. It was running around the lounge of my flat like it owned it...it died a slow and painful death I hope! I sprayed it with spider killer which made it jump a bit before it then started to curl up and then I stamped on it with my big Van trainers...I'm so mean BUT in my defense Spiders dont deserve to live, Im scared of them.
I like Vera and Peggy - Peggy is a girl's name, btw, so what the fuck is that all about?! And great pics.
And a great alternative take on spiders from Moo, very funny indeed.
Oh, and you have made me blush by including me in your links (and that goes for Moo also)- shucks, you guys. I'll get round to returning the favour for both of you v v v soon!
Finally, I must pop in here tomorrow following the Millwall v Plymouth game. As we lovingly say to visiting fans: "You'll never make the station!!"
Peggy and Vera? You said that there were no spiders. You said you have seen no snakes or spiders. Is that a red back? Probably seeing as it has a red back yuck. xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
tbsmadu. tina b is mad u know
I won Nats £2,000 for a charity of my choice. community award for my emergency bears. The other 3 categories got £1,000 each for charities of their choice and I was the champion £2,000 because my story was so strong and made them laugh and cry. I am the champion. xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx Love you. This was out of 54 entries.xxxxxxxxxx
I'm impressed. I love little creatures and they are cool. Peggy does look like a red back (closely related to the black window so I read, so don't get bitten).
Is Vera a huntsman? She looks lovely and fluffy. Where did she learn where to cook scrambled eggs?
AND Mookie! You are a bad person. You should cover them with a pint glass and then slide some card underneath and release outside. Spiders are our friends. (especially ones like the picture with cute little black beady eyes - lots of 'em!).
Two more points.
Firstly - is it my imagination or is there a finger in Peggy's web? That is some predator!
Secondly - I didn't realise how many spiders eat spiders!!! This must be wrong. Apparently white tails eat red backs. But they look so small?
OH! one more. Were you drunk when you wrote this? It doesn't have your normal flow.
ikbohm - rapper's slang for a skinny white boy whose ass needs a whuppin'
Hmmm. Are you sure Peggy is a red back?
She looks more like a Black house spider (Badumna insignis).
Mind you still have nasty bites.
Are/were you a bit bored?? Or perhaps drunk as Spunky pointed out.
Spunky, I can just about get as close to a spider to kill it, I cannot possible put a glass over the top of it coz that would mean getting far to close to the spider. I am very afraid of them, in the winter my mum used to make me go spider hunting in our house to find any spiders lurking about and then kill them...its all her fault I'm afraid of them!
Reidski your blog is cool and I'm honered to have you as a link!
I do believe Nat was drunk yesterday, I can vouch for that after the emails I recieved whilst at work! Quite hilarious!!
Moo NO! Please do not kill spiders!!!!
It's very bad karma.
If you can't get close enough to them to put a pint glass over them then how about buying one of those bug catchers that are on a long stick so you can catch them from a couple of feet away.
http://www.spidercatcher.net/
I'll even buy one for you. But please don't kill them :(
Nat, have just doscovered there's an Aussie version that's suitable for spiders up to 5 inches across. So, should that redback decide to take up residence in your house you can get rid of it without getting bitten!
www.spidercatcher.com.au
H x
(vlwvybum - i dread to think!)
H, I might cosider buying one, however Im moving at the end of the month and my friend has 2 cats so the chances of seeing a spider are slim coz the cats should catch them and kill em for me!!
Moo, Don't kill spiders. They are lovely.... and stuff
Reidski... both names relate to my grandmothers. Millwall v Plymouth?
Not a chance.
Millwall will obviously win?
....who ever heard of Plymouth winning?
Ma, there are no bad spiders here. Just really friendly ones!
Spunky, Yea, Vera is a huntsman. She has lovely hairy knees like a huntsman.
And yes, was drunk when I wrote this....
Does it matter?
And it may have been a common garden house spider..
In my mind though, it was was a very poisonous spider and would have had your arm off in a flash!
Stig, was very drunk. Woke up at five this morning with my clothes still on........ bad!
Gentleman Hobbs, I like cats, Will you call your next cat Edith? Just for me?
1-1, so honours shared - although it means we are now bottom of the league. At least i got to throw some rottern tomatoes and eggs at the Plymouth fans as they walked past the house after the game, tee hee hee!
Cant believe Plymouth managed to draw and not lose...however Reidski, shame on you!
natalie darling you are v v v weird! spiders are insects how the 'bleep' can they be cute!!!! eugh!!! we never seem to have a problem with insects,maybe its cos we've got snap the killer cat!!!!! (anyone who knows me knows that snap is a larger version of garfield and is probably lazier than garfield too!!!) snap is hopefully moving house soon (sob sob) he is too old and fat to make the plane journey to oz with us. so we will have to get another when we get our own place.
*curls up in corner and cries*
I agreed to go to Australia for 12 months with my girlfriend on the condition that I "wouldn't actually see that many spiders. No, really, you hardly ever see them."
She lied to me! Lied!!
Also, I'm billing you for therapy :P
Reidski, A fucking draw? I thought everyone could beat plymouth?
Moo, agreed but no shame on reidski. I never liked those stripey green tops plimuff wear so serves them right!
Shaz, they are lovely and they eat flies. Thats very good in my book. And they are quite cute. Especially the huntsman with his hairy legs. They get huge...I saw one climb into daves car boot one night. I must admit, I nearly peed myself. He was the size of my hand!
...don't worry they don't bite though.
Fuckkit, honest, thats the first time I've seen spiders since I got here 11 months ago (well apart from the above incident). Am really disappointed that I haven't seen any more. And the only snakes I've seen have been dead (or half dead ones) in the middle of the roads in the bush. They don't really exist, I promise. Don't let it put you off. This is a bloody fabulous place, you'll not want to leave.
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